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For the most current version of this FAQ please go to the arc-t homepage located at "http://www.enteract.com/~digialex/arc-t/".
alt.religion.christian-teen Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
This FAQ is posted whenever I feel like it in an attempt to piss off as many people as I possibly can. This FAQ is maintained by me and any comments or suggestions should be kept to yourself.
* I added our new regs, David Matthieu, Lindsay Jackel, Tom Hanks (who (knew?), and Microsoft (who bought us by the way)
I. Introduction to arc-t
Welcome to alt.religion.christian-teen! Now go away.
alt.religion.christian-teen (arc-t), while containing the words "christian" and "teen" in it's name, has actually grown into an active group full of Christian teens. Oh wait, I guess that makes sense. While Christian discussion is certainly welcome, it's usually relatively boring, so do us all a favor and keep it to yourself.
II. Tips on Posting
Here are a few suggestions on posting that will help you get into the flow of the group as quickly as possible:
* Post in HTML.
Unless you're so arragont as to actually think that someone might want to read your posts, you should always post in HTML. Use lots of unnecessary formatting to make the code as bulky as possible. If anyone complains, send them a response in HTML that is 10 times as large as your original post. In fact, you should probably send it to them 100 or 200 times to make sure they get it.
* Don't quote any text in your replies.
Nothing is worse then knowing what someone is talking about. I mean, way to ruin the fun! So don't quote any text in your response, and try and be as cryptic as possible, using vague terms and never mentioning names.
If you _must_ quote text in your reply, wait until a 20 or 30 page post comes along, and then quote the whole thing and only add a single line of text in response. Or better yet, don't say anything at all!
* Don't get to know the regulars.
They're a bunch of creeps anyway.
* Tear threads to pieces.
It's important that we know _exactly_ what the content of your post is going to be, so whenever you reply, be sure to change the subject of the post. The longer the better!
* Posting links.
Spam as much as you want. We love it. Especially. Heck, is name practically _is_ spam!
III. Frequently Asked Questions
1) Isn't the name of this newsgroup alt.religion.CHRISTIAN-TEEN?
1) Isn't the name of this newsgroup alt.religion.CHRISTIAN-TEEN?
Actually, no. That's a typo.
2) Is there a chat room for arc-t?
No. Well, maybe. But we don't want your kind there. Whatever it is you are.
3) This newsgroup sucks.
Yes, actually, it does.
4) What's the deal with this "email@example.com" guy?
Lindsay Jackel is probably the only good thing in this newsgroup. He's a light-hearted open-minded kind soul who will do his best to relate and understand you and share his ideas in a way that makes you feel as if you truly want to get to know him better.
5) When am I considered a regular?
Are you nuts?
IV. Who's Who
This is the sad bunch of sods that inhabit the newsgroup. Ignore them if at all possible.
* Allen (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Allen hasn't been in the group for some time. I think he has the right idea...
* AntiSocial (email@example.com)
Anti is a 13 year-old Christian girl who likes to pick daisies and sing love songs to her pet fish "Mary Magdalene". She is a kind, soft-spoken girl who just wants to love everyone to pieces.
* Anton the Man (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Anton is firmly against the idea that there is any sort of spirit. He is also against sex. Which is probably a good thing, nobody in this group should be reproducing.
* Blade (Blade@mysanctuary.demon.co.uk)
Blade is the resident Creation Scientist in our newsgroup. Just try and bring up evolution and he'll quickly refute you with sound evidence for creation.
* Charos (email@example.com)
Charos is a firm supporter of the war against drugs. He feels that _any_ chemicals ingested into the body are bad, including perscription medicine, caffeine, etc. He sometimes even thinks the chemicals already in his body are bad as well, and will do whatever he can to remove testerone, etc.from his body.
* Dobbin (Dobbin_42@Hotmail.com)
Dobbin believes that a God is most definatly possible and that there is no reason to believe that this isn't the case. He sometimes argues both sides of the fence, but someone electrified the fence so he's finding this harder and harder to do.
* Ben Ferguson - YOPEZYO (firstname.lastname@example.org)
YOPEZYO posts on a daily basis, more then any other poster, and is likely to stay a reg for years to come.
* Jane Hall (email@example.com)
Jane is the youngest resident of arc-t at age 7. But she's got the wisdom of a grandmother.
* Jason - Jbar08 (firstname.lastname@example.org)
* Jo (email@example.com)
Jo is one of arc-t's many swinging singles. She also detests computers, especially first-person shooters.
* Andrew McMurchie (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Andrew is one of the groups many Christians. He came up with the excellent argument for God that goes something like "Is so!" Most of his arguments stem from this exciting and powerful argument.
* Timothy Meyers (email@example.com)
Tim is like a warm ray of light shining love over all of arc-t. A former girl scout (he is a guy, but was so lovable that they let him in anyway), he brings a warmth and charm to the group rivaled by none. He is also very firm in his belief in Christianity, saying that anyone who doesn't believe in Christianity should be hugged and kissed and rolled around in chocolate and licked clean (I think he may have been in the girl scouts _too_ long)
* Michelle - Rewnfloot (firstname.lastname@example.org)
MiSSY. What else is there to say? She once used my body as a human shield.
* Chris Nelson
Very firmly against the Catholic church. He also tries to write short stories and the like, but is truly awful at it.
* Nick (email@example.com)
Nick went away. We miss him. No really, that last bit wasn't supposed to be sarcastic! No really!
* Matt Noonan
Matt is a Southern Baptist who thinks Buddhists are silly little people who should repent before burning in the eternal hell fires.
* Mich Pharm (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Mich is so farn unique already, I can't think of anything else to say. :D
* Kevin R. (email@example.com)
Kevin went running off somewhere. I think it had something to do with the mafia, I don't know. Unless you give me a lot of money, then I might know "something".
* Sam - SJR (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Sam always makes sense and has no problem relating his well thought ideas in clear and concise sentences.
* Steven Schrader (email@example.com)
Very quiet, but very antaganostic and aggresive when it comes to his belief in the Christian God.
* Jon Seymour (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Jon loves it when people post things that are already answered in the FAQ.
* David Shipley (David@dshipley.demon.co.uk)
David _never_ agrees with Steve on anything, which is odd because they're both the same denomination.
* wersh (email@example.com)
Wersh is the love-child of Tim and Sam. I _told_ you he was in the girl scouts too long.
V. Related Links
There are none. We prefer to keep to ourselves.
VI. Who Supports This FAQ?
Nobody. Nobody at all.
This FAQ was first written on April 1, 1999 by Steven Schrader.
Oh, by the way, April Fools. :)