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silence
________
i walk down another
lane and my
hair is wet and my
clothes are drenched with
thoughts of
pain and life and
short reflections in the pond
and of a mirror that
i gaze through
these thoughts they are
like a gushing
waterfall spiralling down
to a bottomless
end
yet even behind my
black veil i
enjoy the
calm and reflection it
commands
i now can see
the branches on
the tree
there are many leaves that permeate yet
one
falls
drifting slowly down
settling finally
on a
blade of glass the
wind hurries its
journey to the
river
doomed is its life but
why should
anyone
care it is not
in my wallet
i see what
noone sees
i hear what
i feel what
noone does
it is my dark
comfort
ha!
the world has
gone
silent
my voice echos
through
Hong Kong
nothing
here i am on my
silent planet
noone to
bother
noone to
oh!
i see a
candle
its light flickers as
someone smashes
it
i see her with
my eyes and i
REACH out yet
nothing
nothing
oh GOD! Why?!
black night
the rain begins to
pour down on the
night in
silent bliss
i hear the
rain drops pitter
patter
against the
window
i step
outside
water floods down
and i see
its beautiful brilliance as it
comes down near the
street light
i reach out and
grasp hold of the
light
i shall give it back
to the
candle
as the rain falls
all around my
being i
sit in
solemn thought
'one drop. 24.
two drops. Sharpe.
three drops. car.
four drops. scream.
one, Highlands. two,
hit. three, scream. four,
run.
9, hate, pub, run. scream,
hit, dead, run. one,
two, three,
four. one, two, three,
scream!'
silence
the road
my heart! ack
heavy
headache
mad
grips chest, no
breath.
silence.
loud! shut up! i can
not hear!
go away
leave me!
dark veil wrapped
silently singing softly to
myself, holding my arms
rocking, holding my arms
rocking
humming... loud!
hair
hair is for pulling
looking at 5,000 things
5 seconds
straining my brain
collapse
i lie there
silence
i stare into
nothing
i cannot
sleep
i hit myself
kick
punch
silence.
i can still
see her
on the road
one, breath.
two, breath.
three, breath.
four...
silence.
the two men
____________
i once lived in an apartment
where i knew two old men
one lived downstairs
the other upstairs
i could no longer pay the rent
the two men,
offered to pay
the man downstairs he
said, come, love me and cherish freedom
i will pay your rent
just do as you wish
your life is yours to live
i will pay your rent
the man upstairs he
said, come, love and cherish my Son
He will pay the debt
show you great things
call on his name
He will pay the debt
i had two friends
one went downstairs
the other upstairs
my friend downstairs he
said, go, my room is miserable
i am dying of my own desires
i did as i pleased, drugs, sex, all misery
the other day, my downstairs friend
he died from aids, his last word, "liar"
my friend upstairs he
said, come, my room is peaceful
i live with the man, i call him Father
the man's Son, saved me, gave me
joy, He said, come and sin no more
and drink from living water
choices
can be great decisions
that rattle angrily
if kept in a box.
on my knees
_____________
when i am weak
i fall down
on my knees
then on my knees
God gives strength
every time
and everytime
i lift hands
praising him
while praising him
God gives peace
love and joy
love and joy does
great healing
on my knees
but on my knees
i do weep
God is grace
i will sleep now
__________________
tall and defined against a
wall or
mirror
blazing from the
tops a wonderous
flame that
causes a
question or a
sigh, thought
you vanish but build
amazing strokes of
solid
that touch to finger
warm
i become
immortalized in
your touch
myself defined in you and
you defined in
me
i have dreams
when i knew you
so well
sometimes they scare me and
at other times i
find rest in
thoughts
a flickering light going
in and out as the
wind blows the
grass with great vigor
the wind chimes chattering loudly
with one another about
the approaching storm
perhaps they
know all
those chimes, they never
stop talking when darkness
comes this way
next time i
shall ask them
o, dear chimes, is that
darkness coming for
me? or is it
just a sweet symphony of
nature that has
come to put me to sleep
again...
but i look back and
my tall friend is
now so small! only
so much more time before
the flame within
burns out
aye, i do not have anything to
feed the fire
i will drown in
my thoughts some
more
the chimes are
screaming now and my friend
is only vanishing smoke. the
trees are whipping wildly and the
birds are finding shelter.
the sky is a perfect black and
gray swirls at noon
i will sleep now.
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